My Akoha Backlog #2 – George Carlin was a (Cynical) Genius

Back in Christmas 2005 I received a George Carlin 2006 Calender, because I apparently loved his work along with the rest of my family. Never mind I was too young to really grasp what he gave the world or even bothered to find out (even to this day), George was still appreciated by me, so the calender was a thankful gift…in the form of getting it, that is. See, I never used it once through the whole of 2006. I read through the first few days of quotes, Then left the calender sitting somewhere through the whole of the year. It was otherwise a wasted purchase upon me.

And bless my young stupid heart, I understood that failing, and made a decision to make the investment in me worthwhile by finding some means to use the calender in a creative project. On what that would be I had no idea, but it was going to make proud those who gave it to me and especially George Carlin. The aspirations of the young are ever ridiculous, especially with the lack of self understanding. While I always understood myself to be stubborn, it took awhile for me to understand I was a lazy ass, and the calender was still valued as important in the process of the four times I’ve moved. I recently got sick of it just sitting in my drawers and finally made my move.

So what’s the plan for the calender, which has really only formulated recently in the 8 years it’s been sitting in my drawer? Each day’s quote will translate into a page of a finalized book. That’s 313 pages, because Saturday and Sunday share the same quote on this calender. The quotes themselves amount to 12,000+ words, and when I’m through with the writing it will be over 50,000+ (the arbitrary number of words a published book is required…apparently). The content of each page will depend on the quotes, for which I will discover trends and a flow to the writing (or create one from some means). And in order to even start on this project…I had to transcribe every single quote by hand. Which I did.

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And because I had to read every single word, I discovered something that didn’t really click with me before: George Carlin was incredibly morbid and depressing. Or maybe it was just the tone in my head as I read the words, rather than how George would really say them? Then again I hate it when people tell me, “It’s how you say it,” also because the words George used cut right to the chase. His way of thinking could be bitter, mean-spirited, and cruel at times, but it came from a place that was genuine. He understood where we were going when it still felt like just an act, and that’s the biggest joke of all. I yearn to know more of George because of this venture of mine, but I’m also worried about what I will find. Someday…

While I managed to throw away almost all of the paper slips as soon as I was done with them, I managed to save the last month’s worth and selected the best ones. Why? Because I was going to take out two birds with one stone, and finished the “Message in a Bottle” Akoha mission. For this mission, I was required to, “write a witty saying or favorite truism on a slip of paper and leave it somewhere hidden.” Because most words of wisdom people spout are really just other’s words to begin with, why waste time writing when I could just tape up the already typed up slips?

And I did just that. After snipping the pages down to size for taping, placing my red duct tape ring in my pocket, and getting my trusty video camera in hand, I walked out into the world to spread a little truthful misery…well, after hours of depressive confusion, and then walked into the start of a rainstorm, but out I did go.

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There were more taped up, but I didn’t want to risk my camera getting wet during the rainstorm. And hopefully the lot that were in the rain stayed long enough before they washed away or before someone angrily tore them down, because some of you may note something: I basically just committed an act of vandalism or whatever law this falls under. Should you say as such to me, please die.

No, not really. I’m just more than a tad frustrated with following how I’m “supposed” to act. That’s one of the major flaws I have: being too submissive to known and presumed authority, to the point I police myself from doing things that are “wrong”…and it sucks. I’m making myself miserable over the most little of things when I should just be acting out instead of wondering what the consequences are, and how to get around them in the most perfect way.

So if what I did has some teeny bit of legal recourse, I’m alright with that. I’m getting some words out that feel powerful to me. Morbid as all hell, but powerful, and the world deserves to know about them. Again, I hope they are noticed before a cleaner gets all huffy about them. And that’s another Akoha mission in the bank. Booyah.


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One thought on “My Akoha Backlog #2 – George Carlin was a (Cynical) Genius

  1. zombiejoe May 28, 2014 at 12:18 pm Reply

    My personal take on it would be depending on where you put it. Duct taping something to a tree? Once the posting is gone and the tape removed, there is no marking of the passage. To someone’s house or the floor of a foyer (even in a public building)? The tape could potentially leave a damaging mark that will remain long after the note is done.

    But that is a bit of the naturist in me. “Leave nothing but tracks, take nothing but memories.” That sort of thing.

    Otherwise, an awesome exercise.

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