My Akoha Backlog #5 – Goodbye Compulsive Pairing

Sometimes there are ideas for Akoha missions which have good intention, but are badly executed. One such mission was “Give It Up!” which asked participants to, “give up a bad habit at least for one day,” and…that’s just plain stupid. Not giving up legit bad habits, because that’s incredibly earth shattering stuff to change one’s self for the better (hopefully). The problem is giving up said habit(s) for a single day. Honestly, what does a single day matter in the scheme of things? Vices of this nature are hardwired into our system, and cause real problems when they are kept away. And don’t say, “This just shows how easy it is to drop a habit if that’s how one day felt.” Try dropping something completely and see how well your mind and body handles the shock of never being able to have that one thing ever again. Just try.

No, please try. It’s really for the best when on the goal of self discovery and reinventing yourself into a more ideal you, especially if that ideal is in your head and beyond the scope of whatever you can really do. But discovering that is a very important part of knowing yourself, which is something which only you can do and gives you the most joy in your life. Knowing is different than doing, however, though I did do plenty of the doing back in my 40 Days & 40 Nights faze. Through it all I found myself to be a very sexual creature, that I can never seem to be rid of chocolate and other tasty food, and I have a hard time breaking habits when they start.

Then depression and constant anxiety robbed me of the drive to continue the changes, now here we are, back to doing them again. Kinda. Depression still owns me, but it’s not going to go away with time but concentrated effort (where possible). Because if I’m going to take this mission on, I’m taking it on with a passion. I’m changing a habit of mine permanently, one which will forever change how I act and work, giving me more time to function and think, all while bringing greater joy to my life. My habit that’s being dropped? Pairing socks. Got to start somewhere.

Sounds rather silly, doesn’t it? Hear me out. Socks are not permanent, and tend to wear out over time, with the annoying aspect that one will do so before the other, thereby giving you one stray sock. And should it be the last sock of that type, what do you do? Throw it away? I say the hell with that! This realization came to me when I inherited a collection of socks from someone who was donating them, and I thought I would see if any of the socks would be able to suit me. After almost an hour of work, almost none of the socks had a pair, and they were all in otherwise good shape.

I snapped. I threw every sock into my drawer, damning the fact I wasted so much time in the past to find the perfect pair of socks, and for what end? The comfort of others? I could give a damn what others think of me in that regard. Truth be told, mismatched socks and clashing colors is a style of fashion and mindset I ideally appreciate, so why do something that brings nothing but trouble to my life and keeps me from what I want? Yes, still a small vice and habit to change, but it’s a step in the right direction. And my feet looking fucking adorable. You have to give me credit on that.

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