A little tipsy right now, and JUST managed to persuade myself from biking to Walmart before they close at 11 PM. Just so I could buy a scale to accurately measure the weight of a future package so as to sell it properly on eBay. And this is a thought that started in my head before I started drinking, mind you. Why I started drinking on this seemingly free day when I can work upon The Things I always talk about…I have no idea. But that’s how it turned out, and I’m making the most of it.
I have a collection of old magazines that I accumulated from my years of accumulation. I am not very fond of those times, because right now they look like just a bundle of junk that happens to be in my space, and I have no use for it, save nostalgia’s sake. In this circumstance, it comes down to two collections: Neopets magazines, and a collection of fitness magazines I used to masturbate to when I was younger. Yeah, I have no shame on admitting that, though just a bit in concern to my parents who may have figured out what I was doing with the magazines featuring models wearing bikinis/lingerie.
Seriously, the muscle development and fitness world of entertainment is rife with sexuality, and it catered to a lot of males from what sense I can gather at this time. Researching the covers of magazines I didn’t know of through the 2000s has shown me that.
Back on point, this day I happened to give myself a bit of free time, and realizing I was far too unfocused to do much of anything, I started looking at my accumulated possessions. And realizing once again what a wreck I am. This happens with me a lot. I got to thinking I would start selling some of these collections I noted on eBay, because surely there is someone willing to spend money to be a little more unhealthy than me!
I started writing up drafts on eBay to start selling these things to strangers over the internet, and thinking I needed to be precise as possible, I wanted to do all of this right now so I needed to get a scale, and get it so as to post it before the night was through. Backpacked up, shoes on, and rushed to the door to make the less the 1 hour time frame I had to get to the store and shop.
And I stopped and thought about what the hell I was doing. Isn’t the point of doing working on my life a means of making it simpler, rather than more difficult? How is suddenly selling things on eBay, something I don’t intend to repeat a lot of, going to make my life simpler? How was I making my Friday night worthwhile by running around (biking actually) like a drunken fool going to keep me focused? I’m all for building on the moment because it will eventually get me somewhere…but couldn’t I just give these memories away? They already don’t matter to me as they used to. Why not just go to Half Priced Books and see what they will take from me?
So that’s what I decided to do. I set the majority of the items over by the front door, with the intention of driving to Half Priced Books tomorrow (now today, because time passes while writing) and get me a few dollars (or nothing if they just trash/ship it). The latter is the most likely circumstance, and I’m more than okay with that. This is stuff I’ve been holding onto for reasons. Reasons that don’t matter to me anymore, so out they go from my space, so as to not fill it or encumber it when/if I should move. Progress!
…In retrospect, writing while drunk seems to get my mouth flowing a lot more than when I am sober. I may or may not try this again. Or I could just reflect on these thoughts with actual people rather than throw it out into the ether. Working on it.